Now, below is the jump cut. If you click on that and expand the post, there will be MASSIVE SPOILERS.
Winter is coming. Enjoy!
So here now comes the jump cut; if you click and expand you may read MASSIVE SPOILERS.
Episode Two
It wasn't really in doubt, but this week's Game of Thrones episode proved conclusively that Tyrion Lannister is the best character ever committed to celluloid. Ever. Full stop. OK, fine, except maybe Xena and James Bond.
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I must doff my cap and offer humble apologies for the tardiness of this week's Game of Thrones recap. I spent the week in the sultry climes of the South Pacific, wiling away the hours in a dreamy haze of sunshine and tropical punch.
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Raise the banners, get your weapons of mass destruction ready and swear fealty to whichever King looks nicer in his battle armour - it's time for another edition of Raven On, the world's 134,567th best Game of Thrones recap series!
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With all these noble houses and sigils, and lords and ladies indulging their petty squabbles, and political intrigues turning to outright bloody battle - you could be forgiven for forgetting Westeros even has a civilian population. Our occasional reminders are the unfortunate recruits at Castle Black and prisoners at Harrenhal; and the wounded soldiers, tended to by healers like Lady Talisa.
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It's quite obvious I'm about as punctual with this Game of Thrones recap as Lord Walder Frey was at the Battle of the Trident. Blame a busy week in Queensland parliament - or as I now call it, the Green Keep - and an exciting weekend of adventures in stage performance.
Can you believe there are only two more episodes of Game of Thrones left? I'm becoming a bit despondent about the impending end of Series 2. I'm not quite sure what else there is in life to look forward to, if it's not the wholesale slaughter of characters I've come to know and love like a dysfunctional bunch of hedonistic psychopaths.
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I'm somewhat speechless, really. Written with perfect pacing by George R.R. Martin himself, and superbly directed by Neil Marshall, this week's Game of Thrones was sublime and epic in every possible way. I'm not really sure it even needs a recap, beyond the phrase "HOLY. F***. YES."
ONLY THREE MONTHS OVERDUE!
Ladies and gentlemen, I must beg forgiveness for the terrible tardiness of this final recap for Game of Thrones series 2. This is well beyond Walder Frey territory, really. But here it is, finally - the last instalment this season of Raven On!